Day 51: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Contemplations"
February 20, 2013
All day long I've felt like something is just off...there are plenty of things in my life that are 'off' but today I just felt it. I've put a lot of pressure on myself, lots of pressure on my family while pursuing my own goals...and even though I've waited 20 years for this...there's always that moment of...am I doing okay...am I doing the right thing...prayers for strength, guidence and success...I think today those thoughts have weighed heavy on my mind. But I've come so far...and I'm too close to give in or cave in...just knowing that I will someday graduate with my degree...achieve my goal...engage my dream into reality...is it selfish to feel it will all be worth it? In some ways, I suppose it is...but I don't regret a single moment of it. I've put value in myself, and have grown into a person I love...finding strength I didn't even know I had...no I'm not sorry I chose me this time...for the first time ever...I can only hope that those around me...who love me...will someday see that its not about putting them aside, but rather making me into the person I've always felt I was inside...I've always supported everyone else...is it so much to ask that they support me as well?
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