Day 59: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "SCORE!"

Day 59: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "SCORE!"

February 28, 2013

This may not make sense to most of you...but for me...a crazy hat or get up is a major score!  I was searching around in the basement today and found this little gem...OMG!  I am so wearing this to class tomorrow!

Day 58: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "pre-emptive strike"

Day 58: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "pre-emptive strike"

February 27, 2013

The swelling in my eye is going down nicely...that icky jelly medicine really works...but now I'm feeling a cold coming on.  Being on campus is like surfing a petrie dish...there's always something lurking...in wait for a victim...this girl is making a pre-emptive strike to battle off whatever is trying to surface in my sinus cavity, lets hope it works!

Day 57: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "...time to medicate"

Day 57: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "...time to medicate"

February 26, 2013

So...the stye is already out of control...totally swelled my eye shut today.  Yesterday my sociology teacher was afraid of me...acted like I was contagious...so today was a sick day...which really bothers me!  I've resorted to meds in the eye in a hope that this will be better by morning...the kids on the campus bus are already looking at me like I'm abused...for pete's sake...its just a bad stye!

Day 56: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "...seriously"

Day 56: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "...seriously"

February 25, 2013

So this morning when I wake up...I can't open my eye...yes...the dreaded stye!  I had an exam this morning, a crit in the midmorning on some of my b&w photo work and I still have my night class to attend while my eye continues to swell, blur and seep..."...seriously" ...as if I need to deal with this little gem!  My work is my art...I need my eyes to do what I do...I'd have rather I had smashed my thumb with a hammer again than have only one good eye!

Day 55: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "Land of the Lost"

Day 55: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "Land of the Lost"

February 24, 2013

When my hubby brought this get up home...all I could think about was being a kid, coming home from school and running to watch "The Land of the Lost".  Considering I woke up this morning with a horrid stye in my eye...I was most grateful for a way to hide it!

Day 54: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "A walk in the park..."

Day 54: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "A walk in the park..."

February 23, 2013

This afternoon the sun was shining...and even though its pretty chilly outside, I needed to be out in the sun...to get back to nature a little bit.  Though I enjoy living in the city now...I've spent my life as a country girl and I think there's just a part of me that craves the calm of a running stream, warming myself on a sunny rock and tromping through the mud...in its own way it has refreshed my spirit and relaxed my soul...

Starting up another blog...

Starting up another blog...

Because of the 365 series I've been working I have decided to start up another blog for other types of work...if you enjoy what I'm doing here...perhaps you can look me up http://susankomer.tumblr.com/ This one started out for a class I'm taking...it will provide more variations of my current & past work...hope to see you all there!

Day 53: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "nap hair"

Day 53: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "nap hair"

February 22

After a busy day...I nearly fell asleep and missed my image for the day...so today...nap hair is all I have to offer before I lay down and passout for the evening!

Day 52: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Baby its cold outside"

Day 52: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Baby its cold outside"

February 21, 2013

Even though I have lived in Ohio my whole life...I'll never get use to these freezing temps.  Right now we're under a weather advisory for a hit of freezing rain headed this way...I've never liked the cold but the older I get...the worse dealing with this cold gets...one of these days I'll be able to get out of here and move somewhere warm...CAN'T WAIT!

Brrrrrr..."Baby its cold outside!"

Day 51: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Contemplations"

Day 51: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Contemplations"

February 20, 2013

All day long I've felt like something is just off...there are plenty of things in my life that are 'off' but today I just felt it.  I've put a lot of pressure on myself, lots of pressure on my family while pursuing my own goals...and even though I've waited 20 years for this...there's always that moment of...am I doing okay...am I doing the right thing...prayers for strength, guidence and success...I think today those thoughts have weighed heavy on my mind.  But I've come so far...and I'm too close to give in or cave in...just knowing that I will someday graduate with my degree...achieve my goal...engage my dream into reality...is it selfish to feel it will all be worth it?  In some ways, I suppose it is...but I don't regret a single moment of it.  I've put value in myself, and have grown into a person I love...finding strength I didn't even know I had...no I'm not sorry I chose me this time...for the first time ever...I can only hope that those around me...who love me...will someday see that its not about putting them aside, but rather making me into the person I've always felt I was inside...I've always supported everyone else...is it so much to ask that they support me as well?

Day 50: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "SUCCESS"

Day 50: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "SUCCESS"

February 19, 2013

Celebrating a little success today!  I had my first completely essay exam a week or two ago in my 500 level art history course which is on the development of sound in narrative film...my first 500 level art history course...which if you're in college/have been to college, than you know these classes are a bit tougher than usual.  I was seriously nervous about this exam, just not knowing what to expect from the teacher or how he graded his written exams...3 questions, 20 minute limits for each and my entire grade rests on 3 of this type of exam...meaning no papers or homework...just exam scores...which in itself can be quite intimidating.  Typically the Professors are known to hand papers back from the highest to lowest scores achieved.  As exams were being handed back...I watched the pile dwindle to a mere 5 test packets...Oh God...I thought I had failed!  When he got to those last five, he announced that though there were other good grades in the class...those last 5 were the only A's!  Yes...one of them was mine!  So I'm celebrating my success tonight....I always work hard at everything I do...feeling like somehow I have more to prove than the others considering I'm old enough to be any one of their Mother's!  Today felt GREAT!  Out of a class of over 60 students, I received one of the top grades in that class...and was asked to read one of my answers aloud so that others could hear what a 'good' essay should sound like!  Holy crap!  Yes...today...no matter what else has or will happen...has been a really good day!

Day 49: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "OUCH!"

Day 49: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "OUCH!"

February 18, 2013

Today has been a busy day as usual...early morning debate, exam in my Photo 2 class, 2 readings & 2 papers to write, but this little gem happened while stretching my canvas for tomorrow.  We had to do two, by the second one my hands were cramping but I still didn't use my tool...no I risk it and win the prize...OUCH!

Day 48: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "too tired to care"

Day 48: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "too tired to care"

February 17, 2013

Day 47: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer " a big F you"

Day 47: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer " a big F you"

February 16, 2013

This is a big "F you" day!  F you to the person who has stolen my identity and my images and placed them on a lesbian russian dating site...for your information...I've been married for over 20 years and have worked very hard to establish myself as an artist...so F you for stealing what is rightfully mine, including my privacy and exploiting me as if my children, my husband and my own person have no value!  I've also wasted an entire day on the demands of a teacher, along with a lot of money, trying to satisfy a demand that completely makes the point of an assignment being time and money efficient only to go back to my own original plan....which she didn't think was 'good enough' but completely falls within the boundries of the assignment...NEVER AGAIN...and F you for stealing the time I should have had with my family and to accomplish other things that needed done today...I'm sorry you have no life...but I do....and I resent the fact that my grade has to suffer for it!  Right now...its a big F you to the world...I've struggled for so long...just ONCE I would appreciate it if just one thing could go right for me without a struggle!

Day 46: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer 'what if'

Day 46: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer 'what if'

February 15, 2013

I was reading about the beginnings of photography, the microscope and the idea of capturing a 'spirit' using the camera.  There are many interesting ways to produce a 'ghostly' image, the best of them take some staging which I have done many times and enjoy quite a bit.  Tonight I just wanted to see what I could do in a situation where I couldn't control the lighting or conditions...this image has an interesting double...mainly of my hat...but seemed appropriate to what I had read about H.G. Wells and the Invisible Man.  Nothing particularly exciting I suppose, but for me, I enjoy the what if...and I wonder about photography...this is a subject I intend to work with in many different ways the more I explore the 'what if's' in what I do.

Day 45: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "All you need is Love"

Day 45: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "All you need is Love"

February 14, 2013

When you've been married for as long as we have...this says it all!

Day 44: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "overload"

Day 44: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "overload"

February 13,2013

Today has just been a complete overload...and I'm feeling it...hard. I keep feeling on the edge of tears and I suppose I should just let them flow and release the stress...sometimes a good cry is just what one needs to overcome the overload...

Day 43: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Fried"

Day 43: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Fried"

February 12, 2013

You all know what a busy few weeks I've had, and the end is nowhere in sight.  Today I took a timed essay exam that has my hand cramped and my brain flat out fried.  While I feel consumed and overwhelmed with my work load this semester, I'm also amazed at the many things I've learned...things I know now that I had never even realized I didn't know before. The brain is such an amazing machine, the things it is capable of and the knowledge it can store are beyond anything one might imagine.  Each day I learn something new, each day I file away yet another piece of information that at some point my brain will pull from its depths for my use. A lifetime learner, on an entirely new level...I feel proud of that, even if nobody knows it but me.

Day 42: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Sunset"

Day 42: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Sunset"

February 11, 2013

Today as I watched the sunset, my mind drifted at ease with itself. I carry so much stress and self-doubt at times that it nearly eats me alive.  And then something happens, like a sunset that catches my eye, where I can see myself in some new light...making progress that I refuse to recognize until it shines so bright I can't deny it.  I had a moment today, one that all artists long for; a bit of recognition for the work I do...when the sun warmed my face and blinded my sight through the kitchen window, I saw myself for a moment with different eyes and felt content with knowing that all is not for not...I have a goal, a purpose...and if I slow down just long enough I can see that I am making that all happen...and that no matter how quickly I move...it will come to me when I reach it...and that takes time, no matter how much I want it now...there is a process...a time of learning...I might need to slow down a bit and not miss the beauty of the ride.

  

Day 41: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "music soothes the soul"

Day 41: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "music soothes the soul"

February 10, 2013

Kicking back, listening to a little music to soothe the soul and calm my nerves after a jam packed day...losing ones self in song is one of the best ways to let go of the day...thank goodness for my playlist on Pandora!

Day 40: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Shadow"

Day 40: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "Shadow"

February 9, 2013

All day long I've been doing battle with a headache that's held on for the past four days...with everything on my plate, I'm not surprised I have a headache like this, I can feel it in my shoulders and my eyes are swollen...but I keep moving on, getting things done because I have to...even if for now, I only feel like a shadow of myself...I'm still here, this to shall pass...hopefully soon!

Day 39: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "the end of a long week"

Day 39: 365 portraits by Susan Komer "the end of a long week"

February 8, 2013

Finally...the end of a long week...while there is still much left to be done...much has been done...and for that, I am grateful!

Day 38: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "spoiled"

Day 38: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "spoiled"

February 7, 2013

Life has been pretty crazy lately and will keep being crazy until this semester comes to a close.  This being the time to file taxes and fill out financial aid forms and apply for scholarships on top of everything else in life, I find myself often struggling with tension headaches.  Yet I feel spoiled just knowing that I can do these things...and I always have Shawn to rub the tension out of my back at the end of a long day. While it might not seem like much to some, to others...yes...I am a lucky girl, and I do feel spoiled that I have someone here to help shoulder the load while so many others have to do it on their own.

Day 37: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "Kickin' back"

Day 37: 365 self portraits by Susan Komer "Kickin' back"

February 6, 2013

All I'd like to do right now is kick back and put my feet up for a few minutes...but that's just not going to happen.  I started my day with an 8 a.m. class, headed from there to another until noon, came home to eat lunch and then created my mock-up artbook and finished to blanks for my class which I will be heading out to in a few minutes and won't be home until 10 tonight.  The next couple of weeks are going to be madness as I have lots to do for school along with financial aid and scholarship applications AND getting my taxes done!  Right now, I feel like crying...but I'll get through it...I always do...just feeling guilty for the kids who will have to 'wait' for this all to pass before they get their Mom back...and that just sucks!

Day 36: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "flowers in her hair"

Day 36: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "flowers in her hair"

February 5, 2013

Most people get flowers for some special occassion or as a pick me up after a rough week...my hubby brings them home for disection!  That's right, the kids need to disect flowers for science today...so these beauties will be meeting their fate a bit early.  But I couldn't help notice the colors in my favorite hat happened to match the bouquet...perhaps that's why I love this hat so much!

Day 35: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "a helping hand"

Day 35: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "a helping hand"

February 4, 2013

For those of you who don't know...I took a bad fall a few days back, my hand is the only thing that doesn't hurt.  Typically I'm the type of person to always offer a helping hand; today, I could use one...

Day 34: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "Doing what I love to do"

Day 34: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "Doing what I love to do"

February 3, 2013

While I love to work digital, I'm fascinated by shooting film and truly love spending time processing in the darkroom.  Yes, digital makes life a bit 'easier' I suppose.  But there is just something completely magical about creating images that work in the darkroom.  I have the advantage of having access to the university darkroom this semester and the opportunity to improve my skills in this area.  My first few rolls of film were practice in focusing as I tend to have a bit of camera shake fear, this time around I'm just going to town shooting everything and anything just to see what I can capture...I'll be processing two new rolls this afternoon, can't wait to see what's on them!

Day 33: 365 self-portraits Susan Komer "slip & fall"

Day 33: 365 self-portraits Susan Komer "slip & fall"

February 2, 2013

Oh God!  Major slip & fall...stepped up on my side step to my truck and slipped...fell on my lumbar straight onto the curb and twisted my arm...back & arm hurt like hell right now...I HATE WINTER!

Day 32: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "power nap"

Day 32: 365 self-portraits by Susan Komer "power nap"

February 1, 2013

Sometimes in life...especially towards the end of a busy week...a power nap is totally in order...I got mine today, did you?